I couldn’t think of a better subject for this post. It is absolutely mind-boggling how much life can change in such a short period of time! The wine has worn off, so I know that’s not the total reason for the laughter and the tears. The home videos I’m watching right now date back to 1992. It’s just a collection of random events that my dad compiled for me a few years ago on one VHS. I’m almost speechless (as I sit here and fast forward through the dozens of images of Candy Cane Lane in Southern California)! Wow.

  • My family is greeting me at the gate as I get off the plane (seems like a lifetime ago that we were able to do that).
  • I’m opening gifts the day after Christmas with my siblings sitting with me (and now we barely speak).
  • My hair is just…well, unmentionable!! WHO LET ME OUT OF THE HOUSE WITH MY HAIR LOOKING LIKE THAT?!?!
  • My voice is AWFUL! Who exactly was I trying to sound like? Wow, the phases of life.

I just finished watching 2 hours worth of these movies and I feel like I have traveled back in time. But I honestly can’t tell you what I’m feeling as a result of it. There’s a little nostalgia, but not much. I’m so thankful that I’m now free. That’s one thing I definitely couldn’t say during those years of my life. I was not free. I had so many things I was literally dying to say and I just couldn’t. Since then I’ve been able to and I’ve grown so much. I thank God for that.

I don’t know what else to say right now. Do I wish things were different? Do I wish I could go back to those times? Do I have any major regrets? Can I really answer those questions?

Anyway, I did think this was pretty cute:

Daddy’s 1994 Christmas “poem” as he captured shots around the room:
The stockings are no longer hung by the chimney with care.
They’re hanging on the buffet just glad to be there.
The boxes are flattened and empty too.
Shirts on the table and Power Rangers too.

Poinsettias made of silk and candles that have melted.
Jurassic Park videos and Speak ‘n Spell…??? [He couldn’t think of anything. :)]
Empty boxes all around, floors littered with trash.
Daddy’s walking around with a wallet, empty with no cash.

Been a great one this year and a fun one too.
Looking forward to New Year’s. There’s nothing else to do.

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