This is me on October 23 at a party at a good friend’s house. You wouldn’t think I was at a party from the way I’m dressed, but this is my alter ego.My IRA would be a lot more heavily stocked if I had just a penny for every time someone has said something to me along these lines:
“You talk like a white girl.”
“You’re so proper.”
“Where do you go to school?” (Please be sure to read that with a negative connotation.)
“There’s no way you grew up in College Park.”
“Oh! I forgot. You went to Landmark…(or Oglethorpe).”
“You wouldn’t know anything about that.”
“I see you were the only chocolate chip in the bunch once again.”
“Are you sure you’re Black?”
And this is what helped me determine what my alter ego is.
I dressed down…way down. I shed the pieces of myself for which I get teased. There are many situations in which I feel it necessary to do this in order to avoid criticism. I don’t always alter my physical appearance, but my diction does change, I try to use more slang, I try to “be down”, just to avoid the criticism that I’ve always gotten since I was little…from people I barely know, and even from family members!
That evening was absolutely amazing! Having so many women (about 17) in one place who were so willing to be so incredibly open and honest was very refreshing. I could have cried. Most of the women there were mothers, since it was a “Sister Circle” for a Mocha Moms chapter (I had to include the picture of the t-shirt just because it’s so cute! ALMOST makes me want a baby. ☺)
I’m so glad Lillian included me in this get-together, even though I’m not a mom. I was forced to really dig deep and analyze this part of me that I had never really given a lot of thought to.